Should you take flowers to a funeral? Is it appropriate? It can be difficult to know the right thing to do. That’s why we’ve put together a quick guide on taking flowers to a funeral. In fact, there’s a number of different things to consider before you decide what’s right in your circumstances.
Etiquette of taking flowers to a funeral
A few things can impact the decision to take flowers to a funeral. For example, religion plays a big part. In some religions it’s appreciated, with others it’s not necessary. The type and colour of the flower are also important things to think about – we'll get onto that in a moment.
Other than religion, factors such as family requests and the type of burial may also influence your decision. But don’t worry. We’ll share more details on these three points to consider, below.
How religion may impact your decision to take flowers to a funeral
Different religions and cultures have different etiquettes when it comes to taking flowers to a funeral. Let’s learn a bit about them…
East Asian funeral flower guidance
If you’re wondering about taking flowers to Chinese, Japanese or Korean funerals, colour is one of the most important things to consider. White flowers are generally accepted, but you could also opt for yellow chrysanthemums as they are traditional funeral flowers in these cultures. White lilies are also an appropriate choice. Just make sure not to send anything red, as this is regarded as a happy, celebratory colour.
Christian funeral flower advice
For Catholic and Protestant funerals, all types of flowers are accepted. But if you’re thinking of sending them to the funeral rather than the family, it may be best to arrange this in advance to avoid any confusion on the day.
Islamic, Hindu and Sikh flower tips
Sending flowers to Islamic, Hindu and Sikh funerals isn’t customary. However, if you’d like to pay your respects, it’s best to speak to a religious leader or ask the family if they’re accepting flowers as it can vary.
Jewish funeral flower etiquette
Sending funeral flowers isn’t considered appropriate in the Jewish faith. Instead, you may pay your respects by visiting the family’s home during Shiva – the seven-day event after the funeral has finished. If you’d still like to offer a bereavement gift, Kosher food is a better option.
Considering family requests
Before going ahead with sending funeral flowers, it’s best to check with the family first. This is to make sure that your kind gesture is in line with their wishes. For example, a lot of families may ask for you to send a donation to a charity, as a way to pay tribute, instead of sending flowers.
Burial type
If you’re attending a traditional funeral service, it’s best to follow the guidance above about religious and cultural considerations. However, if it’s a non-traditional funeral, such as a natural burial, there may be other things to think about.
The best thing to do is to check what the rules are at the natural burial site. Some sites may only allow biodegradable flower arrangements. This means that any flowers wrapped in cellophane, oasis, plastic trays or tied with florist ribbon won’t be allowed.
How to send flowers to a funeral
Before the service you might find yourself wondering, do you bring flowers to a funeral? This isn’t standard practice and it’s usually only the immediate family members who’ll do this. You can arrange to have flowers sent to the funeral if you’d wish, providing you’ve checked that it’s okay with the family to do so. Just make sure this is arranged in advance to give the funeral director time to display the flowers appropriately.
Not sure where to start? Other than checking with the family and being aware of cultural factors, one of the first steps is to find out when and where the service is being held. This info is often included on the funeral invite or the memorial website. Next, choose an appropriate flower arrangement and write a small message in the card with them. Try to do this no less than a few days before the funeral to avoid any stress or potential holdups.
So to wrap up, do you take flowers to a funeral? The answer is - it depends. Now we’ve covered all the possible considerations, we hope you’re feeling more confident about your decision. Also, if you’re not sure which flowers will be best, read our guide on choosing funeral flowers to understand the different meanings behind them.
