What is an end-of-life doula?

Doulas help people who are dying and their families to feel safe and supported, and this non-medical role is growing in popularity. Here’s what you should know about end-of-life planning and the role of a doula.

Sometimes referred to as ‘soul midwives’ or ‘transition coaches’, end-of-life doulas not only share their name with childbirth doulas, they have a similar mission, which is to assist and accompany. However, instead of offering support to people at the beginning of life, they support people at the end of life and make it more comfortable and natural for them to die at home if they want to – this means supporting the dying person and those around them. After all, deciding to care for a loved one at home can have a major impact on family life. Doulas strive to maintain the best quality of life possible for everyone involved.

Do they replace medical care?

No. Centuries ago, people traditionally died at home surrounded by family members, however the rise of modern medicine, hospitals and hospices has meant that this is often no longer the case. But that doesn’t mean that death can’t be an intimate, spiritual and peaceful experience, regardless of whether medical support is required. Doulas do not replace medical care, but help family and friends access all available information as they support someone in their final hours, days or weeks.

Doulas are sensitive to practical, emotional and spiritual needs, and offer a consistent and compassionate presence, with knowledge, experience and understanding. Their role is to preserve the quality of wellbeing, sense of identity and self-worth from the moment of diagnosis through to the death of the person they are caring for.

How can they help me?

It’s a very flexible role that’s tailored to individual circumstances, and a doula’s responsibilities can be agreed following an initial discussion. They might only work with the dying, or they might help out with day-to-day tasks to give you more time to spend with the person who is dying. This can mean cooking, cleaning or playing with the kids.

They can also assist by talking to care agencies, doctors and nurses, helping to translate medical jargon and asking questions that you might not have thought of at the time. And, when the moment comes, end-of-life doulas are there to support the bereaved and help with funeral arrangements if required.

How can I find out more?

Living Well Dying Well (LWDW) is an organisation aimed at encouraging conversations about death and finding ways to support people’s wellbeing at the end of their lives. Today they run courses for people facing death or the death of someone close, offer workshops for therapists and health practitioners, and provide end-of-life doula training courses. They also partner with a number of death cafes  to host discussion groups about death and dying.

Remember, if you need extra assistance following the death of a loved one, we can help you locate and compare funeral directors and the services they offer in your area.

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Funeral Director fees

The price quoted contains the Funeral Director fees for a simple funeral. This includes:

  • Funeral Director fees for meetings, paperwork and running the funeral
  • Collection of the deceased and care prior to funeral
  • Hearse or appropriate vehicle for transport to the funeral
  • Basic coffin

The Funeral Director fees quoted do not include third party costs (often called disbursements). The Funeral Director will guide you through your options. These costs are:

  • Cremation or burial fees
  • Medical certificate for cremation
  • Clergy or officiant fee for conducting the ceremony

In addition to the disbursements you may want to discuss optional costs with your Funeral Director - these could include:

  • Funeral flowers
  • Memorial (venue hire, catering etc)
  • Memorial headstone
  • Orders of service
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What is a Direct Cremation?

A Direct Cremation is an alternative to the traditional funeral. This involves the cremation of the deceased without a funeral service. A Direct Cremation is generally the most economic option because costs of the coffin, preparation of the body, funeral service and expensive transportation are not included. However, many people choose Direct Cremations for reasons other than expense, for example:

  • - Wanting to have a memorial at a different time to the cremation
  • - Expressed desire from the deceased to not have a ceremony
  • - Individuals with relatives who face big physical or geographical challenges in coming together for a ceremony

The prices quoted for Direct Cremations include:

  • All charges, meetings and paperwork for the cremation
  • Collection of deceased and care prior to cremation
  • A simple coffin and urn for the ashes
  • Cremation fees and delivery of ashes to the family
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Attended funeral

This is Funeral Choice’s best estimate of this Funeral Director’s fees for an Attended Funeral, which is where family and friends have a ceremony or service for the deceased person at the same time as they attend their burial or cremation.

This price includes the following:

  • Taking care of all necessary legal and administrative arrangements
  • Collecting and transporting the deceased person from the place of death (normally within 15 miles of the funeral director’s premises) into the funeral director’s care
  • Care of the deceased person before the funeral in appropriate facilities.
  • Providing a suitable coffin
  • Optional viewing of the deceased person for family and friends, by appointment with the funeral director
  • At a date and time you agree with the funeral director, taking the deceased person direct to the agreed cemetery or crematorium (normally within 20 miles of the funeral director’s premises) in a hearse or other appropriate vehicle

In addition to the Funeral Director’s fee, there will be third party costs to consider (sometimes called disbursements) to cover the other aspects of a funeral (such as the crematorium or burial fees). Your chosen Funeral Director will be able to provide these for you.

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Unattended funeral

This is Funeral Choice’s best estimate of this Funeral Director’s fees and the crematorium fee for an Unattended Funeral, which is where family and friends may choose to have a ceremony, event or service for the deceased person, but they do not attend the burial or cremation itself. This is also known as a Direct Cremation.

This price includes the following:

  • Funeral Director's fees
  • Crematorium fee (for an unattended funeral) as selected by the Funeral Director

In addition to this fee, there might be additional third party costs to consider (sometimes called disbursements). Your chosen Funeral Director will be able to explain these for you.

If you wish to attend the funeral, you should view the “Attended Funeral” price instead.

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Why is this price Estimated?

We work hard to ensure the Funeral Director Fees we display are accurate and up to date. However, unlike with our partners, we cannot guarantee this price is correct today.

Funeral Director fees

The price quoted contains the Funeral Director fees for a simple funeral. This includes:

  • Funeral Director fees for meetings, paperwork and running the funeral
  • Collection of the deceased and care prior to funeral
  • Hearse or appropriate vehicle for transport to the funeral
  • Basic coffin

The Funeral Director fees quoted do not include third party costs (often called disbursements). The Funeral Director will guide you through your options. These costs are:

  • Cremation or burial fees
  • Medical certificate for cremation
  • Clergy or officiant fee for conducting the ceremony

In addition to the disbursements you may want to discuss optional costs with your Funeral Director - these could include:

  • Funeral flowers
  • Memorial (venue hire, catering etc)
  • Memorial headstone
  • Orders of service
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Funeral Choice charity donation

To redeem the £20 charity donation all you have to do is select the charity from the dropdown list in the Make Contact form. Once you have confirmed arrangements with that funeral director send us an email to info@yourfuneralchoice.com confirming the service has been arranged. After we receive this email we will make the donation to the chosen charity and confirm back to you.

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